There are a handful of people that have known me a long time. Oh how I love these people. Friends and family that know me in a way that doesn't feel restrictive, like I am being typecast as the person they think I am, but in a way that feels homey, reassuring, and structural.
Annie is one of these folks. When I called her in 2006 to tell her I was pregnant, a realization hit her like a bolt of lightning that she herself was also pregnant. But we met when she was nineteen, nine years ago, when we both worked at an indian restaurant. She'd regale me with stories of her wild nights while we waited tables, and hike in the woods on our days off. She'd come, at a moment's notice, when on a whim Bella, Nathan, Xi and I decided to hold an impromptu costume party. And one night invited us to her house where she and our friend Wally had built a living room-sized fort large enough to fit all of us, a box of pizza, and the equipment necessary to screen a movie.
She has been that friend that has supported us as parents, and as individual humans. The one you call to add spice to a party, or when you want to die clothes and cook food. She has known me as a singleton and as a mother.
In short, it feels good to have her around.
She comes as a package these days, with a dear and awesome husband, a fantastic little three year-old, and a round belly holding their next baby girl. In some ways it feels so odd to see her round belly while my belly remains, although not entirely flat, definitely not pregnant. It's as though we have moved back in time since her current belly looks so much like her last baby belly, but the toe-headed almost four year-olds bouncing around the living room remind us that a lot of time has passed, very important time.
They are staying in our guest room, another testament to the passing of time, since the last time we hosted Annie our home was still one and a half bedroom, tiny and cluttered. It's Echo's first time having a "sleepover" that doesn't involve an aunt or grandparents and it has been both a delightful novelty and cause for great stress. At once she adores Aila, mourning the very idea that she will ever leave, and at the same time sees her as someone who might hold the doll she wants to hold, sit in the chair she was about to sit in, or do something that she might want to hold/have/sit on/use at some point.
We have found ourselves at the Feeleez poster more than once.
Babies, kids, bellies, home changes, it is all more than enough to see "the passage of time" from that odd, objective perspective. We are like characters in a novel, waiting tables in chapter 2, clearing the dinner table of sippy cups, chatting with the husbands in chapter 10. I can only guess about chapters 25 and 35, what her bangs will be like, what our kids will be doing in their homes and lives away from us.
I'll post photos when we get there.
That must feel so relaxing and safe to have such a good friend so close to you. She has been with you through so much! These relationships are so special.
Posted by: Kristanne | 04/12/2011 at 04:20 PM
Oh! And I gotta say, you have a gorgeous pregnant belly!
Posted by: Kristanne | 04/12/2011 at 04:20 PM