In a Nutshell

• Offer empathy as a first response, then wait.
• Live an empathetic life.
• Wear your baby, hold your baby.
• Nurse. And nurse. A long time. 
• Sleep together, or near one another.
• Avoid praise.
• Abandon punishment.
• When in doubt say nothing except "Hmmm..." for at least a minute.
• Never say a word about a child's appearance. Or dirty face.
• Before fixing a problem with suggestions hear the feelings first.
• Watch what your mind is saying about your child, question wether or not this is a helpful perspective, or not.
• Tell the truth. 
• Provide enormous amounts of information about how our culture works, the physics of the material world, and everything else under the sun.
• Avoid the word Mine. 
• Be confident in loving your child with empathy.
• You can't actually make a kid do anything.
• You are stronger and more powerful than you think.
• Put blind obedience on the back burner.
• Say what you want your kids to say. Please.
• Make no hard and fast rules.
• Parent with empathy from the very beginning.
• Make your home emotionally safe.
• Embrace the insanity of living with young people.
• Appreciate your partner.
• Know that you are not alone.
• I will support you.

Comments

[Annie]

Thank you for this! Yes!

[Rachel]

This is just what I needed! Thank you!!

[Jennifer]

A great bulleted list! Sending to my hubby and sister. Some of these come so easy, some are harder for me. But we're always just trying to do the best we can, right? Love the "When in doubt, just say hmmmmm." Thanks for being a tireless champion of the little ones!

[erin]

oh, how to make this a clickable poster?!? I'll take the poster of this even without clicks. Succinct and helpful reminders...thank you!!

[Rosie]

This is so lovely the pictue and the words. I would like this to hang on my wall - REALLY big. I will have to come back late and read all the other links.

Is this your painting?

[Natalie]

No, not my painting. I'll google it again and see if I can track down the artist. Glad you like the post!